How to get pizza delivered outside of your pizza zone
Determine Your Sex
Male conscripts should make a generous donation to the party for the privilege of ordering a pizza from Pizza Corps. Your generous donation may entitle you to certain citizen rights, such as a pizza delivery outside of your assigned pizza zone. Female conscripts should fill out their R23b Explanation Form with reasons for ordering a pizza which is outside of their pizza zone as them being not clothed enough to leave their living quarters.
OPTIONAL If you desire a female Pizza Junior, when filling out your R92p Pizza Delivery Preference Form, under section 4, question 3, when you are asked to report your Primary Pizza Criteria, out of the options [FLAVOR (TASTE), TEMPERATURE (WARMTH), TOPPING ACCURACY (ADDITIONAL SCREENINGS FOR ROGUE TOPPINGS), CARE (STATE OF CHEESE LAYER)] you should select CARE (STATE OF CHEESE LAYER). The delicate hands of a female Pizza Junior are usually selected to fulfill pizza CARE (STATE OF CHEESE LAYER) criteria.
NOTICE: Selecting more than one Primary Pizza Criteria will cause your order to be canceled upon preliminary review by Pizza Corps and result in a fine.
NOTICE: Please be advised that because female Pizza Juniors are highly sought after because of their pleasing pizza scent and brightly-coloured uniforms, this technique is not 100% guaranteed to result in a delivery made by a female Pizza Junior.
Place Your Order
Once your forms are filled out, you must call and place your order. The Pizza Corps Location Operator will ask, question by question, for your answers and you must provide them exactly as answered on your paperwork. Once the call is concluded, record your Pizza Order Confirmation Number onto both your R000 Pizza Order Form and your R23b Pizza Explanation Form.
Wait For out of Pizza Zone Delivery Confirmation
A Pizza Corps Communicator will deliver by hand either an Official Office of the Pizza Corps Department of Communication One Time Pizza Zone Delivery Exception certificate or an an Official Office of the Pizza Corps Department of Communication Pizza Zone Delivery Intent to Enforce certificate.
If the former, inspect the certificate for a seal and signature from the Acting District Pizza Controller Second Class. In the case that none is found, reject the certificate and report this Communicator to your Pizza Corps District Office. Acting District Pizza Controller First Class are too busy coordinating district toppings distribution and would not sign and seal a certificate of this level. If the Acting District Pizza Controller First Class is noted as signing and sealing the certificate, reject it and report this Communicator to your Pizza Corps District Office.
In the event your application for pizza delivery outside of your pizza zone is rejected, the Pizza Corps Communicator will assign you a new food to order in place of Pizza. In this event, you can disregard the remaining steps.
NOTICE: Failure to order your reassigned food will result in a fine and a hearing before the Office of Take Out Foods and Portable Snack Services.
Wait for your Pizza Delivery
NOTICE: Failure to receive your pizza delivery will result in a fine. Please hold all excursions or loud activities (such a playing an instrument, sleeping, or taking a bath) until after your pizza has been delivered.
Receive your Pizza
Your pizza will arrive carried by a Pizza Junior in a Pizza Corps-issued pizza delivery vehicle. For safety, when the Pizza Junior rings your bell or knocks your door, depending on your district, you may wish to verify they are in the proper uniforms of a Pizza Junior. Male Pizza Juniors will be wearing black shoes, black slacks, a white collared shirt, a deep red suit jacket, and a bright red beret. Female pizza juniors will be wearing black shoes, with bright red tights, a bright yellow skirt, a tan coloured blouse, a bright red suit jacket, and a rainbow coloured hair ribbon. The ribbon will include between 5 and 7 cardinal rainbow colours, depending on your district. Both sexes of Pizza Junior will have a badge issued from Pizza Corps pinned to the lapel of their suit jacket, with a short chain connecting the badge to their Pizza Corps issued inspection dagger.
If the male Pizza Junior is not wearing his beret, or the female Pizza Junior is not wearing her rainbow hair ribbon, report them to the on-duty Pizza Senior at their office location.
Inspect the seal on your pizza and note its condition to the Pizza Junior, who will record it on their R56r Pizza Delivery Form.
OPTIONAL: Inspect your pizza. If your pizza seal bears marks of tampering, if the Pizza Junior is rude or seems untrustworthy, or if you have any other reason to doubt the accuracy of your pizza, you may call your right to inspect. The Pizza Junior will ask you upon your receipt of the pizza if you would like to call your right to inspect. (If they do not, report them to their Pizza Senior.) At this time, you may call your right to inspect the pizza by saying aloud such that the Pizza Junior can hear you, "I call my right to inspect the pizza." At this point, the Pizza Junior will use their Pizza Corps inspection dagger to break the seal of the pizza and both you and the Pizza Junior will note the results of the inspection on the Pizza Junior's R56r Pizza Delivery Form. If the pizza does not meet your approval, note the issue to the Pizza Junior, record the issue on the R56r Pizza Delivery Form, and say aloud "By my right of Section 2 outlined in the Take Out Foods and Portable Snack Services Constitutional Amendment, I reject this pizza." The Pizza Junior will return to their office with the report, and a A Pizza Corps Communicator will visit you to record a more detailed report and your information will be recorded such that your order can be added to the Pizza Corps Replacement Pizza Queue. In this event, you can disregard the remaining steps. Please note it may take up to 30 days for your replacement pizza to be processed depending on the queue length and the distribution of toppings in your district at the time the replacement pizza is processed. If your toppings are not available, a toppings voucher will be delivered along with your replacement pizza.
Pay for your Pizza
The Pizza Junior will ask for money or party credit to cover the amount communicated to your that your pizza will cost, based on your toppings, distance, and citizen status. Be sure to cover the amount exactly.
NOTICE: Under or over paying for your pizza may result in fine from Pizza Corps.
NOTICE: DO NOT TIP THE PIZZA JUNIOR.
OPTIONAL: Attempt to befriend the Pizza Junior. Befriending a Pizza Junior may lead to a permanent pizza zone reassignment if the Pizza Junior deems that there is a significant discrepancy in the estimated delivery times from your original pizza zone (or for a pizza zone to be issued at all if you were never assigned a pizza zone).
Steps to try to crate a friendship with a Pizza Junior:
- a.) If the Pizza Junior is of the opposite sex and you are attractive, you may choose to wear revealing clothing, or remove your shirt as a sign of interesting in a friendship.
- b.) If you are unattractive, adding more layers of clothing, or obscuring your face may make you more approachable.
- c.) Pizza Junior is a stressful title. You may attempt to gauge the Pizza Junior's relationship to their Pizza Senior by making a disparaging comment about the Pizza Senior.
- d.) You may offer a Pizza Junior a beer. REQUIRED: If a Pizza Junior indicates to a private citizen that they do not like beer, you are required by law to tell them you agree and hate beer. You can try offering them another type of alcohol and repeat the response as needed, but failure to agree with a Pizza Junior about alcoholic beverages may result in incarceration.
- e.) Male Pizza Juniors may be swayed by complimenting their beret. (If the Pizza Junior is not wearing his beret, do not under any circumstances attempt to befriend him.)
- f.) Female Pizza Juniors may be swayed by complimenting their rainbow bow. Being able to list all of the Pizza Corps standard rainbow colour names in their bow may earn additional favor. Misidentifying a Pizza Corps standard rainbow colour name, however, will ruin any chances of friendship. (If the Pizza Junior is not wearing her rainbow bow, do not under any circumstances attempt to befriend her.)
- g.) Some Pizza Juniors have interests outside of pizza. Ask them to name their interests outside of pizza, if any. If they have interests outside of pizza, discuss those interests with them.
If a Pizza Junior arrives wearing jade epaulets, DO NOT ATTEMPT TO BEFRIEND THEM. Jade epaulets are an indication that a Pizza Junior is on review for promotion to Pizza Senior, and they will not respond favorably to any attempts at friendship, as this will reflect poorly on their conduct review.
Eat your Pizza
Once the requisite paperwork has been filed and the Pizza Junior disembarks, you may eat your pizza at a rate of 1 slice per 8 minutes, as outlined in Section 3 of the Take Out Foods and Portable Snack Services Constitutional Amendment.
NOTICE: Eating your pizza too fast may result in a fine.